Stay with me

Even when you can’t be here

Stay with me

Even though I don’t deserve you

Stay with me

Especially as my eyes close.

Wait for me.


There is another part of me.

This part wants to taunt, scream, laugh and ridicule

…at the emptiness

Behind where I have fallen;

The only tracks are my own,

Scuffed, unsteady and defiant.


A floor of pillows

Repeated falling;

Falling in front of you

Over and over;

You see me get up,

But it’s the fall you remember.

Away from you, towards you,

A dive with closed eyes

And stillness.

“Open them” I say,

As I gather and unfold to my feet.

I gently push your arms down, back towards your sides

And keep my eyes fixed on yours;

Even after landing.


Pointless aching

Caught in a complex net of fraying strings;

Coarse, abundant and savagely visceral

As remnants of feeling are

Ripped screaming from their root

Leaving deceptive shadows in places you once knew;

Disguising organs, displacing sensations, mapping invisible scars.

The back of the hand is an open wound

Weeping piteously as it reaches

Longingly into tomorrow.